What should you expect when your husband returns home from deployment?
You’ve survived 6 months without your best friend and father of your children. You’ve sent care packages, emails and crossed off the days on the calendar, and now your hero is coming home. (If you’re at the beginning of a deployment, read my tips here) But, whats next? What should you expect after deployment?
Homecoming
Many times, we wives tend to over do it on the homecoming. We hire a photographer, have banners and balloons made, invite people over, and plan a party. The fact is, after a long flight, and potential bus ride, your husband will be tired. Ask him if he wants a large celebration, or just a small dinner with the family. Remember ladies, it’s about him.
Unfamiliar Territory
I hope you’re sitting down. Ready? He will have changed. For months, your husband has been surrounded by other guys in uncomfortable quarters and potentially dangerous atmosphere. He may have developed habits, or speech that you dont recognize. You likely have changed your hair, and moved the furniture, and adopted a new routine, as well. You will both need to reintegrate after a deployment.
Reintegration, again
After deployment ends, and the excitement of homecoming is over and the dust settles, you need to find one another again. Not the love letters, or the sleeping in his t shirts, but the relationship you once had. For some couples, this happens naturally, but for many others, it takes considerable effort. I urge you, ladies. Don’t nit-pick if he doesn’t fall right back into the routine. Be patient, be supportive, and just love him. The same with your kiddos. Their relationship may take time to rebuild, but dont rush it.
Conclusion
After deployment, is where the real work begins. My advice: tidy up the house, cook his favorite meal, put on a pretty dress. Meet him with a sign, a kiss and a big hug. When you get home, make room for him to be back in your life. Don’t rush, dont force. Just listen (if he wants to share) and love him.
